|
Day 19
I'm not doing so well. Just after my last journal entry two days ago, I started feeling really down emotionally. That, in itself is nothing new for me. I have Seasonal Affective Disorder, and sometimes depression, too. I do what I can to deal with it. I try not to move into a really bad, negative state of being. But as it goes with such things, sometimes it can't be helped.
So I haven't been exercising. And I know when I do, I WILL feel better. I love that exercise high. I just can't get the energy to actually do it.
I feel dehydrated all the time. And I'm sick of drinking water. Normally I love water. Right now I just don't. I feel really bloated and dried out. And yes, I got my period as well two days ago, so I am sure a lot of it is hormonal.
It's not that I've been eating a lot, or really more than I should. It's just that I've been eating the wrong types of food.
I just feel really demotivated right now. I was really doing well and I was so excited about my progress. And I felt good. At least I don't feel as bad as I did two days ago (emotionally) Physically, I'm really tired.
I have been able to feel a change in my body shape and size, especially in terms of how my clothes fit. Now I can't. It's like I feel the way I was when I started this diet. Although I know that can't be. I haven't picked up weight. God, I hope I haven't. I'm too scared to even consider getting onto the scale.
I think I'm just going to take it slow this weekend. Get some me-time. I don't want to start blaming myself for messing up. I just need to accept it and move on. And try not to make the same mistakes again. I don't want to see it as "I have failed" although I do feel as if I'm not on the right track right now.
What do you all do when you feel demotivated?
|