Diario de rumali, 04 sep. 08

I must confess - I am upset re: my weigh in.
Warning: don't read on if you don't want to see me boo-hoo on the page.
I'm only putting it out there in the hopes it will help somehow (so they say) - advance apologies for the following rant.

I found journal entries in my notebook today from June - I weighed my usual 119. My weight gain started around then, even though I watched what I ate & kept active. By the time I found FS last week, I weighed 129 - with a steady sneaky gain.
For my FS diet, I carefully watch my caloric intake, cut out wheat, cheese/dairy, cut back 75% on wine/alcohol, & exercise daily(vs. 3xweek). Now I weigh 130.

I feel stuck/powerless in here, mostly I'm afraid I won't stop gaining ~ much less get back to my normal weight. My body hasn't done this before, and I'm not handling it very well. I'm probably being dramatic & impatient.

The only thing (besides age) that I can think of to make sense of it is I got laid off at the end of June - it was an unexpected shock to me. I was happy there, & it was the 1st 'real' job I felt proud of. I've been working elsewhere since then, & thought I was fine - maybe it affected me more than I think? Used to be stress made me lose weight.
Whatever, I don't know, I'm just really po'd/freaked right now.

There, I wrote it.
Tonight I will have wine - aha, I'm whining;)
G'night all!

My FS 'Poem eu de Sarcasm':
I am perfect the way I am....
There's more to love...
This too shall pass...
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder...
Muscle weighs more than fat...
I have a pretty face...
It's what's on the inside that counts...
I'm big boned...
It's water weight...
I look healthy...
(Sarcasm is truth spoken through fear:)~

Ok, I hope that generates a giggle somewhere!

59,0 kg Disminuído hasta ahora: 0 kg.    Aún para ir: 5,4 kg.    Dieta seguida: Bien.

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1076 kcal

Grasa: 17,77g | Prot: 27,24g | Carbh: 149,79g.   Desayuno: emergen-c, coffee, flax plus granola, soy milk. Almuerzo: Teriyaki Noodle Bowl. Cena: nectarine, spicy tuna roll. Pasa Bocas / Otros: Club Soda , red wine,  fruit & nut granola bar. más...

1918 kcal

Ejercicio: Estiramiento (Yoga) - 20 minutos, Sentado - 4 horas, Tareas del Hogar - 1 hora, Trabajo de Escritorio - 7 horas, Conduciendo - 1 hora, Durmiendo - 7 horas y 10 minutos, Descansando - 3 horas y 30 minutos. más...